Discovering Your Soul’s Mission

Recently, my writing mentor took a poll regarding a "me too" comment Tony Robbins made at one of his events. I was clueless about the incident and googled the video on YouTube to find out more (see below). Here’s my response: "Wow, this is the first I've heard, but I just googled & watched the video for myself (along with all the Twitter comments from Tarana Burke & Tony). What I will say is I don't think Tony's intentions were malicious BUT yes, he used poor judgment in his execution. The "me too" topic is a delicate subject for many women (including myself); however, I am NOT a victim. The "me too" movement should be to share, empathize and empower others and unfortunately, some are using it for personal gain (sad to say). I think Coach Robbins should have left that topic out of his presentation all together. He did NOT show empowerment through empathy in the clip I saw (disturbing). But I also know Society is quick to point the finger without obtaining all the facts. Ultimately, nobody knows someone else's heart or true motives. Tony has a tough love approach which I appreciate yet in this circumstance he might want to take a step back & see the lack of compassion he showed. Maybe Tony can take a page out of Oprah's book "when you know better, you do better." Coach Robbins replied to the backlash via a Twitter post stating he has profound admiration for the movement. However, sincerity doesn't come from a social media platform, but rather verbal acknowledgment to the person who feels mistreated. I'm rooting for Tony to reign it in here and do what's right, but it starts by "Being humble to see your mistakes, courageous to admit them, and wise enough to correct them. Amine Ayad." A specific claim Tony made was that he was not mocking the "me too" movement, he was mocking victimhood. Victim: a person cheated, fooled, or hurt by another Survivor: to continue to function or prosper He went on to say how a famous and influential leader he knows hired a man instead of a woman for a job even though she was MORE qualified for the position. Apparently, she was very attractive, and choosing her was too risky. Ironically, Tony attempted to prove his point yet contradicted his own words. This un-hired woman was categorized as a "victim" by her appearance alone. My guess is she's a confident and capable "survivor" although she wasn't given a fair opportunity in this scenario. Listen, Tony's human like the rest of us. However, I'm a little annoyed by his actions. He's the reason I got into coaching in the first place. I think a mirror was being held up to Coach Robbins that day and he chose to be defensive and aggressive instead of listening with thoughtful intention. When you're wrong, you say you’re wrong and mean it. Get off your high horse and lead from a heartfelt place. Otherwise, you’ll lose connection, credibility and be powerless in your pursuit of influence. What are your thoughts? Watch here: Tony Robbins and #metoo - what is wrong with this picture? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74YILhy4RgE Tony Robbins apologizes to #MeToo founder: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fUD3npnKME

Over the years, many of my clients have struggled with a desire to satisfy others. As a result, people pleasing becomes second nature to avoid conflict or judgment. But think about it, would you prefer to do what’s comfortable or what’s truly right (for you)? I'm certainly no stranger to this topic. Growing up, I was the girl who aimed for perfection and desperately wanted to be liked by others. As a result, I allowed fear to control my every step to the point of exhaustion. It took me 20 years to realize I don’t need the approval of others to live my best life. Fast forward to today, and here’s what I know to be true: There is no shame in being "perfectly imperfect"! We are all flawed in some way, shape or form. Wouldn't it be liberating to remove the mask and confidently express yourself to the world? Taking ownership of your identity alleviates the overwhelming sense of discomfort that tries to defeat you. You have to love yourself first before anyone else will. Accepting your unique qualities and traits can be a challenge so why not learn to appreciate the beauty of your differences. For instance, my great-grandmother had crooked pinkies that were passed down to me and my kids. Although many think it’s weird, it’s always been special “to us” which makes it kind of endearing. Social acceptance is highly overrated. If you feel emotionally inadequate with a strong desire to “fit in” it may be time to reevaluate your inner circle. Don’t buy into the belief that you're unworthy or not good enough because it's not true! The fact is you were born a blessing, please don’t let ANYone or ANYthing convince you otherwise! Someone’s opinion of you is just that, their opinion. Virtually no one likes feeling judged, yet most people are their own worst critic. Even so, seeking validation from others is a nasty little habit. Silence the haters and focus on people who love and support you unconditionally. Make no apologies for being YOU because authenticity is the most magnetizing quality you can possess. Self-Worth (Value) + Self-Esteem (Confidence) = Positive Self-Image. Knowing who you are from the inside out and owning it, takes courage! Equally, what you think about yourself and how you outwardly show that has to match. Otherwise, you’ll end up feeling mediocre without any real sense of direction or fulfillment Bottom line, there’s no a right or wrong way to be YOU ! It's time to free yourself from the overwhelm and expectation. Start living for (insert your name). Embrace the person you are at your core level. You know, the one who shines without trying, the person inside who undeniably makes you the happiest!